Shortcuts to my life

The earliest thing I remember is a shadow play, performed by my dad and my brother in the backyard of our home.
Not doubting my own eyes, I believed that this 2D world was real.
You never know what you’re longing for.
You only know you’re missing something you never possessed.
I am addicted to the unknown.
Only in my dreams, it doesn’t appear strange to me.
I perceive everything I want to be free.
Free of feelings that are endangered never to be felt.
Free of insights I will never gain.
Free of desires that will never be fulfilled.
Feelings anticipate thoughts.
I can’t seize them.
I will only become aware of their meaning in the future, when the moments have become my past.
My incapacity to cross the border is due to unfounded anxiety and prevents me from understanding why I exist.
I don’t know how many times I was wondering about this.
But I know I’ve always believed I could be like in my dreams.
This world appears so ordinary to us. We want to be free and let go of things, but also take care of what makes our characters invincible..